“Too Soon?” — The Heartbreak, Backlash and Silent Courage Behind Scott Mitchell’s New Love After Dame Barbara Windsor’s Death
Some love stories don’t end when a person dies.
Some continue — painfully, quietly, and bravely — in the people left behind.
And now, Scott Mitchell, widower of national treasure Dame Barbara Windsor, is finally breaking his silence on the firestorm that erupted the moment he dared to let hope enter his life again.
For years, he said nothing.
But what he reveals now is tender, raw… and devastating.
💔 A Love Born From Grief — And the Backlash He Never Saw Coming
When Scott confirmed his relationship with actress Tanya Franks — a dear friend, a fellow dementia campaigner, and someone who once shared scenes with Barbara on EastEnders — many people responded with compassion.
But others?
They attacked.
“There’s always someone who says, ‘That was quick’,” Scott admitted.
But critics forget one thing:
Grief is not a schedule.
Grief is a wound.
And their words hurt more than they could ever know.
What they didn’t see was the man who spent six years watching Alzheimer’s dismantle the woman he adored — memory by memory, fear by fear — long before she died.
🕯 From Husband to Carer — And the Memory That Still Haunts Him
Scott became Barbara’s full-time carer in 2014, years before the public truly understood the extent of her decline.
He still trembles when he recalls the worst moments:
“I wish I never had to experience the terror in Barbara’s eyes… when she didn’t know where she was, who I was — or who she was. That haunts me.”
Her final years weren’t glamorous.
They weren’t glittering.
They were terrifying.
And Scott stayed until her final breath in 2020.
No critic saw that.
But it lives inside him every day.
🌹 Why Tanya Franks Was Different — And Why Barbara Would Approve
Scott didn’t simply “move on.”
He connected with someone who understood the kind of grief that never fully heals.
Tanya Franks lost her stepfather after an 11-year battle with Alzheimer’s.
She ran marathons alongside Scott for “Bab’s Army.”
She listened when he talked about Barbara — and never once made him feel guilty.
“She lets me talk about Barbara any time,” he said.
“She never makes me question whether it’s okay.”
And in a twist that surprised many…
Barbara herself liked Tanya.
The approval came long before anyone imagined they would one day fall in love.
🎄 Christmas With Empty Chairs — And the People Who Fill Them
Scott and Tanya will spend Christmas together this year — a season where joy and grief sit at the same table.
“You always notice the empty chairs at Christmas,” Scott said.
“But remembering our loved ones — that’s how it should be.”
Their holiday won’t be defined by guilt or defensiveness.
It will be defined by remembrance… and the quiet permission to keep living.
🏃♀️ The Marathon of Grief — And the Woman Helping Carry His Miles
Tanya hasn’t only supported Scott emotionally — she has helped carry on Barbara’s legacy.
She ran the London Marathon for Bab’s Army this year, raising money and awareness for the disease that stole Barbara’s voice, her identity, and her life.
“You often feel alone when caring for someone with Alzheimer’s,” Tanya once said.
“Communication allows the support system to grow.”
Now, that “support system” includes both of them — united in honoring Barbara, not erasing her.
🌅 “Life Is For the Living” — Scott’s Quiet, Courageous Truth
To those who judged him, Scott offers one clear message:
“Me being unhappy and alone is not going to bring Barbara back.”
He doesn’t say it angrily.
He says it with the clarity of a man who has walked through hell and survived it.
“Life is for the living. And we only get one shot.”
Yes, people said it was too soon.
But they weren’t there for the midnight panic, the confusion in Barbara’s eyes, the breakdowns behind closed doors, or the mornings Scott woke up alone after 20 years of marriage.
He was.
And now, he chooses to live — not instead of Barbara…
but because Barbara would have wanted him to.